Saturday, February 21, 2015

Reconciliation

Looking at my blog statistics, my last post about apologies seemed to have touched something in people who read my blog. I did not drum up the conversation I had intended, so I can only guess why people liked the post so much. Maybe it was just to see how another person interacts with their children? Perhaps simple curiosity. But if I look deeper, I believe that we all have people in our lives with who we desire one thing: reconciliation. After the brokenness has been caused, we long for closure through acknowledgement and validation. The longing we have  to be connected to each other is a powerful force in our lives.
I think we all have someone we wish would have recognized us in that moment, would have known how they had hurt us, would have cared one little bit.
And maybe we have deep remorse for a hurt we have caused someone else and aren't sure how to make it right.
A friend of mine posted something on Facebook about our culture sucking at apologies. It's true. And since our current times has been called a "culture of narcissism", it makes sense that the entitled and unempathetic would eschew apologies in favor of dismissing and disposing of people.
For inspiration, I offer this: http://theforgivenessproject.com/
Apparently people have been so inspired by this work on forgiveness they have set up forgiveness "booths" and so much more. If you have a day you are needing hope and inspiration and a good cry, peruse this site.
And although this next article is long and full, it does touch on some of the things I have been writing about lately: http://www.fosteringresilience.com/7cs_parents.php (This sounds remarkably close to Internal Family System's 8 Cs of self-leadership:  calmness, curiosity, clarity, compassion, confidence, creativity, courage, and connectedness.)
I believe apologies, giving and receiving, cleanse our souls. I believe taking responsibility for our words and actions builds self-confidence and trustworthiness. I believe caring for each other this way is a force of Love in action and is a peaceful way to live.




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